yes, sometimes i hate how you talk, but thats just you. being you yourself, thats what i like. tho sometimes you dont automatically come to me when im down. i always expect you to be there for me each and everytime. but thats okay, i dont blame you. we're not perfect. just hope that things would get better. i've lost so many people. i cant lose you too. you should really know how much you mean to me despite how i used to remind you.
you helped me get through those problems i had, we had each others back. we were like each other's pillars. im so glad that we made it through. it wasnt easy. im sorry for being stupid, the stupid things i said, the stupid things i did. i dont want you to forget me one day, forget me as a STUPID friend. i want you to remember me, remember me always as the SILLIEST friend you ever had. someone who would stay up all night texting you tons of messages. thinking what you're doing. hoping to put a big wide smile on your face on the next day when you read those annoying yet cute messages.
i always wonder why you like to slam my calls whenever i say something annoying and ignore me. makes me hurt. but its just your way of wanting me to know what dumb things i can say on the phone. i just like arguing with you, how much i sayang you and you say i dont. i dont know why. haha. but the things you do, make me feel secured. a real bestfriend i could ever had. and i wanna thank you, for texting me in the hospital, the only one who teman me through the phone. and i wanna thank you for scolding me for whatever i did wrong.
we used to tell each other, how we really thank God, how He put both of us to help one another. but not anymore? im sorry for what happened during camp. i broke my promise. each time i promise you something, i end up breaking it. im sorry for the night during xmas. i admit. i was jealous. thats why i ignored you the whole night. and im sorry for having that small argument on that night. which made us both really sad the next day. im sorry if i made you confused tho. i was just jealous.
to tell you the truth, there are many things that i am jealous of. im jealous because i'm scared of losing a special friend like you. i've lost so many friends who i had trust, how can i lose another one like you? and you did the biggest favour for me. i wanna keep reminding you that you mean so much. its like losing something really valuable. i really cherish this friendship, and i cant lose it. because you are my GREATEST friend. i want you to be there for me on standby 24/7 like how i always am =(
i know that you dont like me talking to others. especially girls. you're scared that i'll forget you one day. like how i did, and yes i still regret what i did few years ago till today. i lied the biggest lie and acted the greatest act. but i wanna assure you that no matter what, you'll still be sitting at the same spot, the GREATEST friend spot. i'll never forget you i swear. and i promise. this is something i can't break. you'll be thinking "yeah, we'll see". remember what we promised each other? that we'll be there for one another no matter what? i hope we can really hold that promise tho.
i really wanna know what your expectations are towards me, so that i can stop failing you. i wanna know whatever's in your mind. i'm not physic too. please tell me kay? and i promise i'll tell you mine. i'm sorry it seemed so hard for me to put all these in simple words to tell you on the phone. it's hard. but this is just how i profess my sincerity. i hate having arguments with you. i'm really sorry. sorry cant cure anything. but what can i say? sigh.
camp really made things so hard. we argued more and more after it. im sorry i've always failed being someone special in your eyes. im learning and am still trying my best. but please promise me you'll stop slamming the phone and be more patient with me? =/ and to tell you honestly. i cant sleep whenever we have this cold treatment going on. you should be thankful you're the only one im scared of. maybe because of all the high expectations you have towards me. but im thankful for being a somebody in your eyes, makes me feel appreciated.
each time you sing, attempt to annoy me with those cute sounds, call me by that weird cute name you gave really makes me smile, altho i dont say it, i mean, you cant expect me to shout "WOI, IM SMILING LA ENOUGH", but behind that annoying crappy phone, im giving you a smile, a smile that proves how you can make me smile with just simple cute things. tell you a secret. you always fail to annoy me. HAHAHAHA. failure =P
okay its getting late now. AND YEAH. while im writing this, you're still ignoring me. i'm refreshing my damn facebook in hope you'll say something. so imagine how sad i am right now. and how pitiful this is. =( its no fun seriously. and i only have you right now, and while you're not here at this moment. it just suck. its like sitting in a jail cell with no one just a damn computer and a damn blog to write my feelings out. =/ okay then. i hope we'll be better after you see this. ILY greatest friend =D remember that. i hope that after you read this, not only would you smile =) but be so touched, that you'll sob and gimme a hug. HEH.
